If you want to care less about what others think, you must be willing to bother others

(this makes for the BEST writing too)

Can you stomach the idea of another human disagreeing with what you have to say?

Really think about that for a moment.

Because if you want to get far in the world of online writing, this is something you must grapple with.

I’ve worked with hundreds of creators and writers who were blocked.

They held back on expressing themselves.

They chose not to publish when they could.

They allowed their online brands to fizzle out because they created and shared when they felt they were ‘ready.’

I’ve had clients with hundreds of articles stored in their files that were never put out there because they felt icky about sharing.

This all points to one thing that is getting in the way of you being a top writer:

Your fear of being disliked.

Your fear of criticism.

Your fear of damaging your ‘reputation.’

Your fear of not getting along with others.

Your fear of looking goofy.

If I had to pinpoint the one thing I had to get comfortable with so that my brand moved into higher gear, it was this:

I had to get comfortable with the idea that my words would be met with disagreement.

It’s so crucial; it’s the difference between succeeding and quitting.

Now, this doesn’t mean proactively writing stuff to purposefully annoy and troll others.

It means uncensoring yourself.

It means saying what you know is true, without a filter.

Because honesty will propel your writing more than anything I know.

You struggle with engagement because you put up these little defences for security. You say what you believe others want to hear.

But that’s like pouring ash into your pancake mix.

Some may eat it and politely thank you for the pancake.

But no one really wants it.

When you begin to open yourself up to the reality that not everyone will like what you have to say, something interesting happens.

Your writing touches more of the people who need to hear it.

Because now there are no limits to how you write.

People regularly approach me to help them care less about what others think, in all areas of life. They wish they weren’t so uptight, anxious or guarded.

And I tell them what few therapists or gurus ever say:

To care less about what others think, you need to be okay with bothering other people.

You can’t have it both ways.

Because when you walk on eggshells to try to keep everyone happy, you’re signalling to yourself that bothering others is a ‘cardinal sin.’

You emphasise the terribleness of it. And that will make YOU more sensitive to the thoughts and judgements of others.

If you’re worried about bothering others, you will always worry about others bothering you.

To care less, you must stop taking things so seriously.

Any form of expression badly needs this from you, including your writing.

You must be willing to write a post that barely anyone reads and makes you look silly.

You must be willing to attract criticism to your posts, or you’ll find excuses to do other things.

Write to show us who you are.

And who you are, in truth, is not what many people want.

Great!

Now it’s time to move on, follow your system, and write no matter what.

By the way, if you’re ready to take your writing to a higher level, so you grow your ideal audience far more quickly, you’ll want Online Writing Alchemy course.

Learn more about the course here.

And if you’d like access to hundreds of locked articles like this one, you’ll want to become a paying subscriber here on Substack for less than the price of a couple of coffees each month: