Ten small signs you're becoming more mentally resilient

Mastery Den, Saturday Edition, Sofia Starbucks with a flat white, 3-min read.

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If I had to pinpoint a single skill that will serve you more than any other in the coming years, it's resilience.

This is the ability to remain emotionally stable when life gets complicated.

Those who spiral into long-term emotional instability when something challenging happens are no good for themselves or the rest of the world.

Resilience — in a fragile world — is becoming a superpower.

Here's how you know you're moving in the right direction:

You spend less time ruminating on past regrets. 

You find ways to forgive yourself for your actions and even what others did. 

Those memories have less of a hold on you; in many cases, the things you once saw as regretful appear funny to you.

The idea of 'fixing' yourself is becoming less relevant. 

Instead, you're prioritising your projects, goals, experiences, and generally kicking ass for fun.

You're taking care of yourself, eating and treating your body better. 

In the past, you may have lost yourself in escapism and eating junk more easily. 

Good health strikes you as a far better direction to move in. 

It just comes naturally.

You aren't taking everything so seriously anymore. 

You can see the humour in things, even if they don't initially present themselves as joyful or comical. 

People are attracted to your light-heartedness.

When things don't go how you want them to, you find yourself extracting something useful from the experience. 

In the past, you may have dwelled on the misfortune for hours or days. You found yourself depressed and frustrated. 

Now, you can find the lesson in hardship. 

Because of this, you can move on from perceived failures more quickly.

An interesting thing is happening to how you plan the future. 

You're stewing on what you need to do less. 

You see less value in over-analysis. 

It just doesn't seem like time well spent.

You know that when you get on with doing things, and developing good habits, what you need strikes you then and there. 

You plan less and play with reality more.

You stop yourself more quickly now when you're in the grips of an anxious or stressful episode. 

Why? Because the futility of overthinking is evident. 

You see that most of your stresses and struggles are self-generated in your mind. 

Even though stress appears to come from external things like annoying bosses, you know that any suffering ultimately comes down to you. 

Seeing this for what it is makes it easier to let go.

You react in anger far less often than you once did. 

When someone says something that triggers you, you may feel a spark of anger. 

But that anger can be transmuted into calm more quickly now. You can create space between the seeming source of frustration and your reaction.

You're taking more interest in other people, their quirks and mannerisms, than yourself. 

Whereas before, you found yourself self-conscious more often, other people, and maybe their struggles, are more interesting now.

The sense that you can handle life is with you more regularly. 

It's difficult to explain verbally, but there is an ever more present vibrancy in you that springs from a knowing that the future will work out and work out for the better.

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