This way of seeing the world will give you the unfair advantage most crave

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People often say you need to struggle to succeed.

You need to go through some kind of pain to win in life.

It is true that some of the best, most exhilarating moments in my life followed overcoming a challenge.

But people are missing an important piece here. It isn’t necessarily pain that leads to success. If that were the case, we’d be driving hammers into our knees for a sense of accomplishment.

Some of the most satisfied people do little else but work on their gardens, create in their workshop and rustle up grub in the kitchen.

They’re not running ultramarathons, taking cold showers, or competing in face-slapping competitions.

There’s no pain in the idyllic work they do, but there are problems being solved.

And that’s what we’re looking for.

Unhappy people go around hoping and praying another problem doesn’t appear. When it does, they fuss and fight and moan about how hard life is.

Happy people expect there to be problems. They are happy because they see problems as opportunities for continual growth and contribution.

Problems = growth.

That’s what builds this sense of happiness.

Mark Manson said, “Life is essentially an endless series of problems. The solution to one problem is merely the creation of another.”

And that’s fine. The problems never end.

We just need to be careful that we’re taking on the right kinds of problems.

Those problems needn’t involve pain or struggle.

Though we don’t always have a choice in what problems appear in our lives, there is much we can do to invite in the kinds of problems that align with us.

If you’re like me, you like to write. I love to write books. A lot of book-writing is challenging. I get frustrated. Sometimes I want to quit. But these are problems that are worth taking on for me because I enjoy writing, and I know that completing a book is a worthy goal for me — one that fits into the area I’ve chosen to focus on mastering.

I don’t take on problems for the sake of it. I choose not to work as a diving oil-rig welder because the problems involved here are not worth pursuing.

An interesting thing happens when we start expecting problems to arise no matter what.

We make peace.

We even think, ‘I wonder what problems will show up tomorrow that I get to solve.’

With peace, the mind stops cycling, and creativity rubs its hands.

And when you bring creativity to problems, you get solutions.

This begins a self-perpetuating cycle of enjoyment leading to further enjoyment.

It’s a myth that life is supposed to be some horrendous ordeal. Sure, there are hardships and life can challenge us and fill us with fear.

But we also need to remember that we don’t lack choice. We can often choose the problems we’re willing to work on, and we can choose whether we resist these problems or accept them.

When you embrace problems, the real you emerges, and things just get better.

Those who take ongoing responsibility like this have deep self-respect.

Self-respect is like a warm cocoon that preserves a healthy sense of confidence, will energise you like nothing else, and will draw people to you (and they won’t even know why).

In my recent book, The Art of Self-Respect, available on Kindle, I show you the subtle habits that cultivate deep self-respect.

“This book delivers practical, simple lessons and rules that work. Period.” — Jeff, Amazon reader

Purchase your copy here today before the price goes up.

Thanks for reading!

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